I'm so over New Years Eve

Maybe I just need to be over it because if I wasn't over it, I'd be ticked off that year after year I sit here at home alone.

My New Years Eves consist of me hanging out on the computer for a few hours doing God knows what until about 11:30pm. Then I grab a pop *caffeine free diet pepsi* and watch the tube for half hour to watch the ball drop.

Then at midnight I get up off the couch and wander down the hallway to the kids bedrooms. I open the door as quietly as I can and tiptoe to their bedside. I gently kiss each boy *in separate rooms, because you needed to know that* and readjust their covers. Then I leave and get into bed until the morning.

Its been like this for 9 years. Its a fair trade off really. Christmas for New Years. I much prefer Peat work NYE than Christmas day. We have a young family. Christmas morning is important to me. To our family.

So I was a wee bit excited about this year because Peat is working, but he's working days. This means that although we'd probably not make it to midnight, we would get to hang out together. We had planned to tuck the kids in bed, watch a movie and order some dinner in. It was going to be our first NYE together since 1999. Actually, since 2001. I vaguely recall spending NYE 2001 together. It wasn't a fun one. I think we spent it with me doubled over in pain waiting in a restaurant to sit for dinner and even though we had a reservation.....they were behind. Ok so it hasn't been THAT long.

Anyways, Peats pager went off at 6:30pm. And so ends this years New Years plans.

So here it is. Almost 11:00pm. And you know what? I'm heading to bed.

Poor Peat. Out in Algonquin Park in THIS cold weather up to his waist in snow. I'm quite sure he's lovin' it.

He always does.

I guess there is always next year.

Yes. There is always next year.

Michelle

Nobody Move. . . . . .

If I hadn't stumbled upon it myself and seen it with my own two eyes, I would have NEVER believed it in a million trillion years. At first I thought maybe I was dreaming. Perhaps I had just had a dream and that it wasn't really happening but when I took in my surroundings, I realized that it was daytime, the sun was up and out. It wasn't a dream. It was *gasp* real!

I was as quiet as could be for fear of it ending before I had the chance to capture it on camera. I needed proof. I needed to prove it to people everywhere.

I needed to show Peat. I needed to show anyone who would look at it. And you know what? It didn't move.

Which made it more unreal.

It didn't move when I tiptoed past it. It stayed perfectly still.

I was as stealth as could be as I picked up my point and shoot camera and took these two pictures. Its like nothing I've ever seen before.

It scares me a bit.

I don't know if I'll ever be the same.

Wriggs

HEY! I told him NO NINTENDO DS

I guess I can let it slide this time.

Two Peas In A Pod

I just love this picture of Justin. Love it because it was his idea. You may wonder why I don't have many pictures of Justin here on my blog. Its because he does not like having his picture taken.

Who is this boy? This is not the son I have raised. I have had this boy in pictures and sayin' cheese since he was a 5 lb premature baby in my arms.

Yes. I took his picture at the ripe old age of 33 wks gestation :) Sickening really.

So when his Nanny got him a Vtech camera for Christmas, he ripped into it and it didn't take him long to start saying, "Mom, can you just come over here and let me take one picture of you"?

It was like Deja Vu only I was on the receiving end. For once I could show him how it felt. I said his famous line, "I don't feel like having my picture taken again".

Last night at bedtime as we were talking about our day, I had my little point and shoot camera in my hands. As I tell this story, I have absolutely no idea why I would be tucking my child in with a point and shoot camera in my hands. Its not like its attached to me 24/7 but then again, maybe it is and I just haven't ever realized it.

Well would you look at that. Its hanging off my belt loop.

HA, no its not. I don't wear belts and I wouldn't dangle things from the loops even if I did wear them.

Anyways...Justin wanted to take my picture before we shut the lights out and he was hilarious. First he said, "mom, look at the camera and smile". So I did.

Then he said,
Mom, Look at the camera and do this: Then he posed like this:

I couldn't stop laughing at his cuteness.

He was all MR.GQ.

So I took the opportunity to take some stunning bedtime photos of him.

And for the first time in a long time, he let me.

So I let him take my picture too and although they were way overexposed and in some of them he only caught about half my left arm for whatever reason, he was thrilled to bits to be just like me.

He said, "Mom, can we go out tomorrow and get some pretty shots"?

I laughed. I've never said this.

He also said "I'm going to be a photographer like you" I didn't have the heart to tell him I'm only mediocre and lack a lot of confidence.

He's not ready to hear that yet.

Wriggs

Believe

I want you to guess what was THE MOST exciting part of my children's Christmas Morning Festivities.

Was it theeeeee New Air Hockey Table sitting in the middle of their toy room? NOPE

Was it the countless presents under the tree waiting to be ripped open? NADA

See those little crumbs on the plate in front of the boys? See the letter in my oldest sons hands? They must have stared in awe for at least five minutes at the plate of crumbs. I don't know if they were surprised that the cookies and carrots were gone or that Santa had left such a mess.

Regardless of what the actual reason was for their excitement, it was very sweet and innocent.

I saw Justin keep peering over his shoulder at the air hockey table. I was sitting with my camera waiting to catch his expression but I just couldn't move his focus from the plate to the table.

They're so sweet and lovable. Even with their fevers.

Michelle

Merry Christmas To All

For some reason I can not help but be very grumpy on Christmas. Even the week leading up TO Christmas I always just seem to be a bit off my rocker.

The reason that this is alarming is that I Love Christmastime. I love visiting with friends and family. I love watching the kids open Christmas gifts. I love baking ***haaa, gotcha***, I love eating other peoples baking. I love Turkey Dinner and I even love doing the dishes afterwards. Ok I don't love the dishes part. That too was a lie. I love the excitement that the kids show. I love that Justin actually thinks he hears Santa's bells up on the roof. I love that he thinks Reindeer are going to eat the carrots he's put out and I especially love that he is so concerned about how Santa will enter our house since we don't have a fireplace.

Yet I have one decoration in my whole house. Just a tree.

I'm horrible. I'm eager to get it up and eager to put it away. It will be away by closing time on the 26th.

Just wanted to take this opportunity to wish all my friends and family a Very Merry Christmas!

From our house to yours.

The Family

Might Have Just Squeeked By

Had the wonderful yet scary chance to take pictures today for a family that I don't really know that well. I guess you could say I was steppin' out of my safe place.

Anyways what I really wanted was to be able to provide mom and dad with a nice family shot. I think when all is said and done I will be able to do that.

This little girl here just did not want to look at the camera at all and used her gorgeous hair to hide her face. I managed to sneak one small glimpse.

Enjoy.

Michelle

Bad Karma Perhaps

I swear I hate nothing more than when my kids are sick. There is nothing worse. I think I'd rather pluck my eyelashes out one at a time. I tend to say this a lot. I think I need to give it a whirl and see what its actually like. Then I'd probably reconsider my analogy.

Maybe I'd just rather go running outside in bare feet with the -33* weather. Yes, that's it. I'd rather do that.

I just feel so bad for Justin. I'm an over protective mother and I tend to err on the side of caution so when my kids are sick I think I go a little overboard as a parent. I have two general rules.

1) They aren't allowed to move off the couch

2)They aren't allowed to breathe.

Seriously. I chase them around and make them sit on the couch and I do my best to have them NOT breathe on each other. If I could take away the breathing all together and not have it cause any long term harm, I would. Its not like I can just say "Justin Buddy, would you please just stop breathing your germs out for a few days? Just till it passes?"

So I'm noticing that Luke is a little more grumpy than normal...HA what does that mean? He's an arse! Completely moody and grumpy. Only more easily set off....

My one saving grace is that Justin is listening. He's staying on the couch and just hanging out. He even lets me scoop him up in my arms and smother him with cuddles.

He's so warm though. I think I may take him back tomorrow because there is NOTHING better than sitting in the hospital ER waiting to be seen because all the local town doctors offices are closed. I think I'd rather a root canal.

Happy Holidays!

Dear Blog

Dear Blog:

You have been severely neglected and I would like to take this opportunity to apoligize to you. This blog has become a daily part of my life. Therapy, if you will, for my tendancies to be a little overstressed and anxious.

I have no pictures to share, no tips or tricks worthwhile and very little to talk about with my family. Yes yes, Peat is still working hard. That will never change. He's a hard working family man.

And now with our crappy snow blower that we paid $200.00 to fix just a few weeks ago, not working again, he spends his home time, out shovelling. Is that a run on sentence? I don't care. See, I'm letting myself go.

I just wish the snow would stop. Just until March. Is that so much to ask?

And HO HO HO, tis the season for a little illness! Wouldn't be Christmastime without one of the kids being taken to the hospital. I say hospital because nothing ever happens from Monday to Friday between 9:30am and 4:00pm. Nothing. And even if it did, I wouldn't get in to the office anyways. So this morning I had to take Justin in. Which is a little surprising because its usually Luke who visits the ER on either December 23rd or 24th. There is still plenty of time so don't count it out just yet!

So I'm sorry Dear Blog that I've not been considerate of your feelings. I promise to get better.

Here is a picture of Luke I took with my new little point and shoot camera, with no flash in a dark basement. Hence the blur and grain.

Michelle

My hands are tied

Gosh I'm sitting here at work and although I enjoy working, I feel like I could be making better use of my time.

For example, I put out an email on my Birth board *if you don't know what this is, then there is no point in explaining*. saying I'd be willing to fix any ones digital pix. Enhance, fix up , whatever. Anyways, I'm having an AWESOME time doing it. I'm truly enjoying it but just a few minutes ago someone sent me a picture and I'm desperate to do it but I"m stuck here.

Stuck here at work. A place that only an hour ago, I was enjoying.

I'd love to be at home, on my computer so I could play with her pix. I need CS3. I should have brought my laptop. Why didn't I bring my laptop???

What must I have been thinking to NOT have brought my laptop? I'm working here and there is no one here. Just me and one other employee. She's in her office and I'm here at the desk. I could have brought my laptop.

So now I'm just sitting here anxious to get home so I can *see my family first* and then do these pictures.
Should a hobby really consume you this much?

Action anyone?

Ok so just for fun I think I'm going to do a watermark action for anyone who emails me a request.

So basically if you email me at the link up there on the right side of my blog, let me know your business name and I will make you a watermark stamp with your biz name plus the copyright symbol.

It will be an embossed one. I made one for myself yesterday and had a lot of fun with it. I do it on a seperate layer so you can move it around on your picture and by using free transform option you can also change the size of it. I have CS3 so if you have something compatable, email me.

Here is my action on my picture:

I can put the copyright symbol or not. I was just playing around.

Let me know what font you prefer but if you don't, I'll just find a fun one.

Michelle

Was away but I'm back now

My husband was off work on Monday and Tuesday this week and kindly recommended I go with my parents to Ottawa overnight because they were going there to go shopping. I so desperately longed for a full night of sleep and the Gary Fong Cloud Lightsphere, that I was quick to jump on board.

Mostly for the Gary Fong Lightsphere because another night of no sleep is something I'm quite use to.

I love Gary Fong. He's a very smart man however I'm finding that I have two things from his collection and they both do the same thing. Or at least I feel that they do the same thing. But I'm so new at this 'stuff' that its possible that i just don't have the eye yet. I'm happy to let you know that I am anxiously awaiting the EYE for it. I guess I see a difference but when I compare it to my other Gary Fong product, it seems to do the same thing. Mind you, I haven't used the other thing since buying it a few months ago.

Hmm, that could be my problem.

So I went to Ottawa, shopped and shopped like no one was watching. Except they were. My mom and dad hovered over me like a dark cloud because I took too much time in the second Photography shop. My bad. Sorry folks.

Oh and that night of sleep??? I would have slept better at home. My dad snores. Loud. Plus my mom wouldn't let me turn the heat on so I literally slept in the fetal position covered by a thin white sheet LONGING to turn on the heater. I froze all night and woke up severely cramped in my fetal ball. Thanks mom and dad.

Got home and took a pic of Luke. He looked like I felt.

**SOOC PIC, NO EDITING*** dont judge ;)

1-2-3 smile? Ya right!

This is my friend Toby. She came over today so that I could try to get some nice shots of her two boys. Plus maybe a family picture to send to her dear hubby over in Afghanistan.

Toby told me early on that she didn't think that her two boys, Jaden and Deven, would make it very easy on us.

She was somewhat right.

We started inside the house and the boys were hilarious.

Getting them to both smile and look at the camera was almost impossible. Then I realized that sitting like little mannequins on the floor while looking at a camera and smiling a nice fake smile, isn't realistic. Nor is it a good 'show' of who this family *and specifically these boys* really are.

So I decided to just snap away.

I ended up with somewhere around 250 pictures.

At first the kids were roughhousing and throwing each other around but underneath that tuff exterior were two boys just aching to model and pose.

So I took advantage of it.

SO although this dear family photo isn't "textbook", neither are they ;)

Who wants a stiff family picture. There is nothing better than capturing exactly WHO you are.

SMILE :)

Wriggs

Hockey Mom : Loud and Proud *ok, just proud*

Because I am not a loud woman. Except when the kids aren't really listening but that doesn't mean I'm loud ALL the time. Unless they're just really not listening ALL the time. Then I might be loud more often. OK, they haven' t been listening at all lately so I guess I'm a little loud but just some of the time.

I'm a hockey mom. I think that Soccer is more prevalent in the United States so being a "soccer mom" would be the same as being a "hockey mom" except in Canada. And two different sports. Same same.

Above is my sons hockey team. They had a tournament last weekend and I have this "thing" where I like to take a team pictures once they get their medals. I've been doing it forever.

Well, I guess just since last year since last year was his first year in hockey. I've only been a hockey mom for a year. But I enjoy it so Here's hoping for many more years as a hockey mom.

Have I mentioned before that I ramble?

I know, You'd never know it.

So this is Justins hockey team. Justin is the little gaffer second from the right on the ice.

*My right, not his*

This was their first tournament this year. More to come.

GOOO BULLDOGS!

***I personally think they should have spelled their name "Bull Dawgs" but who am I.

Just a mom I suppose.

Wriggs

Crazy Stuff

Just uploaded this picture that was taken a few days ago. The weather was freezing and I had just gotten my new point and shoot camera. I couldn't figure out how to adjust the shutter speed and aperture in manual mode so I switched it into AUTO. I know, I really should feel crappy about that.

Anyways look at the water vapor. The water is warmer than the air. The air that day was a balmy -33*.

Aww, maybe one day bud

I just have to share this picture of Luke. This morning dh went out to sharpen Luke's new skates and we decided we would be taking Luke skating at lunch. Luke had no idea what to expect. I seriously think that in his little mind, he figured that skating would be easy.

Why not? Justin does it. Floats around the ice so smoothly and effortlessly. What Luke doesn't know is that Justin has been on ice since he was 18 months old. Why is it that you slack a little with your second child. It wasn't on purpose at all. We fully intended to give Luke the things we've given Justin. Somehow time was a little short and now Luke is going to be three in March and we're just now getting him skates.

So we took him out today and his little body hit the ice *he was well padded as you might be able to see in this picture*. I will say though, he enjoyed every single minute we were out there. Whether he was face down on the ice *with a helmet* or whether he was up in daddy's arms. He loved it all from start to finish.

I have a feeling now though that Luke will have a new respect for his older brother. And if he doesn't, thats ok. Its nice for me to think so.

Oh, and I tried another texture. Me likes it.

Wriggs

Texture at last

Would you believe I've struggled with textures for SO long. Struggled meaning I have no idea how to use/do them without completely messing up. For example, I didn't realize a texture was just a jpeg file. So I use to open them up and it would cover about a quarter of my picture. And I wondered, whats the big hoopla about. This looks ridiculous.

Anyways, tonight I saw a texture I liked and downloaded it because somewhere I had seen a small tutorial on how to use it. Apparently it was staring at me all along! I had no idea what free transform meant or indicated on my palette in Photoshop. NOW I do. I just had to resize the jpeg over top of my picture, change the layer style and adjust opacity. Then WHAMMO. Done. Well, then I had to erase the texture from my little baby. Thought I'd try it on a picture I took tonight.

Luke got his first pair of big boy skates. Not that he had little boy skates, because he didn't. He was very excited to try them out so I let him pretend he was putting them on.

We've promised him he can go skating tomorrow. I'll have to take a few pictures and videos. Should be an interesting day.

Wriggs

My Children Drive Me To Insanity

Honest to God. I can't even post a picture of them today because I just don't want to look at thier little faces. I've made a promise to myself not to "go there" anymore about Justin so I won't. It isn't helpful to anyone. Not to me, to him or to anyone. So I won't.

Breathe.......

Close your eyes and take a deep breath.

I'm trying.

No pix today, not much of anything. Maybe once the children are asleep.
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10

Nope, don't feel much better.

MOTHER, if you're going to read

Mother, if you're going to read my blog, the least you can do is comment.

Its the little clickable link at the bottom of each post that says "comment".

Honestly. It isn't enough to just sneak a peak, you must leave your mark.

This reminds me of the good ol' days. You know the ones. The ones where you read all my notes and journals and then got me in trouble for what they said????

Ahhh, where does the time go.

Leave a comment MUDDER!

Wriggs

Me and The Boys

I'm trying to come out from behind the camera a little more lately. I

tell ya, I have such horrible bags under my eyes. You can't tell in this picture because I've doctored it up but it really made me quite sad.

This particular picture, I didn't do any skin smoothing on my face but I did find a nifty little tutorial on using the patch tool in CS3. Lets just say its my new favorite tool in CS3 because it looks very natural and its very easy to do. And the easier it is to do, the more I feel like I didn't really have to do much therefore it really must not be THAT bad in reality.

I like to disillusion myself. Its just what I do. I'm ok with it. As long as my eye bags look like they do above. No where near perfectly flawless, I still see some evidence of the sleeplessness that is my life HOWEVER I don't look at it and go.... Oh My God.

It was very fun to see the difference. Thank you Phaunt for that easy to follow tutorial that I will now use in every picture of me.

I use to have a friend who shall remain nameless, and her eye bags/circles were horrible. I never ever said anything but I always use to think , I hope mine aren't like that ever. Well, they are. Apparently I just needed to throw child number two into the mix. And voila.

Thank you Luke. Even though it isn't always Luke who gives me sleepless nights. I think I'm going to hit the sheets early tonight, so i say every night.

Today we had Justins very first hockey tournament of the year. My baby got a goal. Once I figure out how to post a video, I will.

My little Not so Wayne Gretzky.

He did get a goal though. He's a defence man , 100%. Its just what comes natural so we'll just try to nurture that.

LOL

Wriggs

Would you LOOK at THAT !!!

And I'm not even talking about the SUBJECT!

I could be, because he's quite cute too but NOOOO, I'm talking about the background!

When I first got my studio lights, i went out and bought a big piece of black felt and a big piece of white felt *plus two fuzzy rugs*

SO after a few weeks of playing around with pictures I became quite bored with black and white backgrounds. All I really wanted was a piece of fabric that wasn't white or black.

Today Peat said, "Go on into the store there and see if you can find anything" So I DID. Everything in the store was 40% off so I bought four different colors of what you see behind my little elf.

It wasn't quite tie dye but it has that sort of effect to it and honestly, I think its quite cute. And also very easy to edit the wrinkles out!!!

SO, I wanted to share a picture of my photographic little boy. As difficult as this child is, he sure is starting to get into the picture thing. You should have seen the poses he was throwing out there tonight. I swear, I said "lets go take one picture on mommy's new background and his eyes lit up like I just suggested opening every Christmas gift under the tree! For a moment, I thought he was dang near as excited as I was!

Atta boy!

So *drum roll please*

TaDAAAA

Wriggs

My favorite picture tonight

I think I've been editing pictures for days on end. Feels like it anyways. Only problem is, I can't stop. I sit down with the intentions of just playing around for an hour or so and next thing you know, Peat is sitting on the couch yawning because its almost 10pm.

This is the last picture I'm touching tonight but I wanted to post it because I just think its such a stunning picture of Abby.

Maybe its because tonight I focused on staying away from Black and Whites and just trying to get my colors right.

I think color and skin tone is all a matter of personal preference. I personally like warm skin tones in portraits. Period. Nothing wrong with that. Is there?

I don't think so.

So, here is Miss Abby. I think she's beautiful!

YAY

Wriggs

The Mom Behind The Camera

Hello all

So I've been avoiding the camera lens like the plague. Mostly because I feel old. I look old and worn out. I look tired with big bags and dark circles under my eyes. I look....I look.... I look like a mom of two boys who barely gets enough sleep to squeak by.

All that and a bag of chips ;) Literally. I've also put on some poundage. Not too pleased about it.

So I've doctored up a picture that I took this morning. By DR'd up, I mean I gave myself a make over. I look 16 again and I feel good about it.

What do you mean "why is it black and white".

Didn't we already talk about that?

I'm smooth and sleek. Its the new me. If only I could find it in a bottle.

Wriggs

Sneak Peek of Chelsea

Again, Black and Whites. Y'all know why ;)

Here, I'll throw in one with color and you'll see how her shirt is clearly visible in her face. Just check out her eye whites and temples. Yeuch!!!

So this is just a few from my fifteen minute picture session with Chelsea. The girl that Luke has loved since he was ONE.

Tis the Season to be in Love

Its December at last. I'm not excited about Christmas but on the other hand I find once Christmas has come and gone the winter is well on its way. Which means that spring will eventually follow!

This is Chelsea and Luke. They've been lovers since they were just 1. Thats a whole year and a half of loverness.

They like to hang out. Chill. Its just what they do.

Had the opportunity to snap a few of them today and I wanted to share them. Not sure what Chels is doing with the whole "leg" thing but Luke seems pleased as pie about it.

The weather is cold and I'm still learning this whole photography thing. I'm still frustrated and you will notice I enjoy black and whites. I enjoy it because, I love black and white pics and in my basement it is the only thing I'll hang. I also love it because it means I don't have to rely on my eyes to make sure my colors are right.

Heeehee, shhh. Don't tell anyone. I'm sure everyone knows already anyways.

Ciao

Wriggs

Layla

I've been avoiding the camera since about last fall. Not sure why. Probably because I've gained ten lbs since then. Oops.

So instead of posting a picture of myself and crying for the next few hours, I've decided to post a picture of Layla. She's also put on a few pounds since last winter so this isn't exactly a recent picture of her either.

This Layla is much slimmer. As Peat says, she has quite the caboose!

How rude.

Imagine what he must say about me when I'm not around!

Kidding.

He thinks I'm beautiful. He told me so.

Anywho, this is Layla. Lean trim Layla. Last year in the dreadful snow. Actually this picture was probably just taken in May 2008. Told you we had never ending snow.

Now that I'm taking all the pictures, no one takes any of me with the children or me with my husband.

How will anyone ever know that these boys had a mother?

Be back tomorrow. Maybe even with a recent picture.

Don't hold me to it though. I'm feeling like I'm slacking a little.

Michelle

Who ordered all the Fluffy White Stuff?

Like last weeks blast of white wasn't enough? I think visions of last years Winter still haunt me. Chills me to the bone. The six foot snow banks, trudging to the bus stop on Tuesday, Thursday and alternate Fridays to get Justin on the school bus.

Bringing Luke home in the -30* while the wind and snow pelting us on the faces. It was horrible. And if the cold snowy winter wasn't enough, it also ate up three quarters of our spring because we had snow until May.

What kind of town has snow until May? This one.

So although I can not enjoy the winter I will do my best to try to NOT influence the little minds that surround me. I will plaster a smile on my face while my oldest son shows off his snowboarding moves. Even if I am on the other side of the glass sliding door in the warm house. Looking out, at what is sure to be, another COLD SNOWY WINTER.

Note that I've chopped off my sons hands in this picture. Lesson number one in Photography. Keep all limbs intact. Do not chop off hands and feet. Would it have killed me to include them? The answer is yes. I couldn't go any farther back and my lens wouldn't zoom out any more and all this little boy wanted was a picture of him on his snowboard. This was what he said "Mom, take a picture of me on my first snowboard so when you buy me the brand new real one, I will remember this one".

I'm guessing he was trying to allude to something I'm suppose to be buying him ???

At least while he was outside he managed to shovel off some of the back deck. Because I certainly didn't want to do it.

Please note the hat. We are HABS fans. Funny story: Peat is Toronto Fan and one day while Justin and Peat were watching a hockey game on TV, Peat must have done something to anger Justin. Justin said "Dad, what team do you cheer for". Peat said, "I'm cheering for the Leafs".

Justin said "Well FINE THEN, I'm cheering for the Red team. Who are they". ..... and so began his loyalty to the Canadians.

Suits me fine, I come from a long LONG line of Montreal fans. SO I took the opportunity to outfit my child in all the Canadians outerwear. Peat wasn't happy but I was.

So along came Luke. Peat said, "if you have Justin, I get Luke". So we bought Luke everything Leafs.

But Guess What.

Luke wants to be just like his brother, so when dad says "Hey Luke...GO LEAFS GO", Luke USE to say "ya dad, go leafs" but now he says, "NO DAD, GO MONTREAL"

I guess they really do have little minds of their own.

They even argue over who gets the blue plate at the dinner table.

They both want the RED one.

So fun. So sweet.

SO CANADIAN!

LOL

Wriggs

God Love THIS DAY

Please. Make this day never ever end. I'm in love with this day. Today. What day is it? Its Sunday November 30th, 2008. Yes. I love Sunday November 30th, 2008. I'm going to mark this day in my calender and I'm going to celebrate it each and every year!

Ok, going a little too far? Perhaps.

I had the option to put the kids in a daycare for the day. A little something in my town called "drop and shop". For fifteen dollars I was able to drop both kids off from 8am to 5pm. Now, I went in at lunch to pick up Luke thinking he'd have had enough by then, he is only two and a half but he surprised me. Probably shocked a few workers as well. Actually I'm sure some of them wondered what kind of mother I was.

Luke, unlike other two year old who would rush to their mothers arms, decided instead to turn his back and run when he saw me. It felt a little like a slap in the face but from this kid, its not unusual. He likes independence.

At least thats what I tell myself. I had to tell myself a few times on the drive home just in case I started feeling insulted. Which I didn't.

I mean, why would I?

I should be proud of my two year olds independence and security. I've done a great job!

Yes, that's it.

Some may wonder...but I don't.

He loves me. He's probably thinking about me right now.

So its 4pm and today I have had the chance to put up the Christmas tree, wrap the kids gifts and do some fiddling around with the computer. I'm going to go jump in the shower and then go pick up the kids. Surely I can get Luke to come with me if he see's his older brother Justin coming.

I sure hope so anyways.

Today I did have a moment of sadness as I was putting up my Christmas Tree. I put the Angel on the top and then started to put the ornaments up. My last ornament that was stuck to a stocking was a yellow ribbon in support of our troops serving in Afghanistan. It made me think of all the husbands, wives, brothers, sisters who will not be home this year for Christmas. CFB Petawawa is on tour this year and so it made me a little sad that my friends will be home without their spouses celebrating the holidays the only way that they can. With warm thoughts of their loved ones and the deepest prayers that their heart and soul, serving overseas will have a safe and happy Christmas, even though they're many miles apart.

I put the ornament of the yellow ribbon around the Angel at the top of my tree. Just so we don't ever forget about the sacrifices made by our troops and their families.

May God Bless Them.

Wriggs

I'm an expert you know!

You know what I did this morning? Something very stressful. Something very "out of my element" I mean, what does little old ME, know about TIRES?

Many of the people who read this blog *although I'm sure there aren't many and if there are many, you probably DO know* probably don't know that once upon a time I worked a very physical demanding job as a TIRE INSTALLER. I did. I'm not lying. Dirty greasy hands, oil under my nails, coveralls and everything. I changed oil, batteries and tires. Did flat repairs, balanced and rotated tires. Installed new ones, GAVE ADVICE on what was the best for their vehicle!

I was in control of my automotive needs. I did my own oil changes, changed my own tires, maintained my own vehicle because I WAS the professional.

After having Justin I even went back to work for a year. Then we moved here and I quit my job to have a family and raise my kids.

So today I went out in search of new tires because the ones I put on *with my own bare hands* in 2005, needed replacing. And I was the WOMAN to do it. I am a professional Tire expert!

It was hardest friggen thing EVER! All of a sudden I was every person I ever cringed at. Coming into the shop without a tire size. WHO DOES THAT. Look at your tire, learn your size and come INTO the shop and present it to me. Wasn't my job to know what your car took. There are so many different options! So after lowering my head in shame, walking back to my car to get the size, I went back in ready to make a decision.

It was so hard!

It was easy when I was working because I knew OUR tires inside and out. I knew what was the best of what we had, why it was the best and why others didn't quite measure up! Tires have changed a lot in the past 4 years and today I found myself searching *unsuccessfully* for a set of tires from a brand I knew. A brand I trusted.....but I couldn't find any.

SO I had to tuck away my last tiny ounce of knowledge and put my automotive needs, in the hands of someone else. I found myself confused, dazed and completely dumbfounded. I didn't want the tires I bought but I bought them because the price was right. I'm one of THOSE customers now. Just a customer, out looking for some tires. Prefer the cheaper ones because its Christmas and other bills pile up at Christmas.

Its times like this that a wee small part of me wishes I was the expert again.

*sigh*
Wriggs

Case In Point

So here is Justin and Gillian. Gillian in all her cuteness is 4 yrs old and Justin is five and three quarters ;) He wants to be almost six.

Anyways, since the day I took my first picture, I've come to the conclusion that my children are magenta. I don't know if its a gene they were born with or if its the copper hair color that reflects onto their faces but whatever the reason, my children walk around all day with a slight purple/mauve tint to them. No, not really. I guess they could. I've always thought that Justin had allergies because he always has dark circles under his eyes but maybe its just that he is slightly tinted magenta. I didn't know there was such a thing but really, jaundice babies are yellow so maybe mine have something that make them magenta.

It isn't just Justin. Luke tends to have a blue'ishness to him in all his pictures.

Odd.

Must be after their father.

Gillian, in this picture, in my attempt to color correct Justin, has turned somewhat greeny yellow. Sorry Gillie. I know I could have masked her out of the color change, and I will. I just wanted to show y'all that I have no eye for skin tones.

I seriously need off this computer now.

Everything is changing colors.

Wriggs

Pluggin' Away

Just pluggin' away at editing some pictures. I find I'm struggling a lot lately with skin tones.

Sometimes I'll see a picture and someone *from a photography site* will say there is a color cast. Now, generally, once they say it, I see it.

Then I just go in and black and white the picture. Not such a good way to learn...lol.

So I am going to have to start asking for help with skin tones. Honestly, I think pink babies are cute. I don't want them all skin tone perfected, you know? Anyways, I'm starting to think its not the computer, but its my EYE. Not a lot I can do with that is there?

Anyways, I need to do some fixing up and stuff but I'm really happy with a lot of the pictures of Gillian. I thought this one was a write off due to focus but once I opened it up and gave it a slight sharpen and reduced some noise, it looked just fine to me. And as Gillians mother would say, "Oh would you STOP already! It looks good to me"

I say, "mothers always right".

Wriggs

Why can't THIS be my job?

I wish my job could be taking pictures all day long. Honestly. I know I have a lot to learn and a lot to "fix up" on my pictures but in all honesty, I would love to spend eight hours a day taking pictures, finding what works, learning what doesn't work and playing with the 'said' pictures on the computer all day.

But I can't.

I wish I could because it would be a lot of fun! Brandi and I thought it would be fun to get some naked baby pictures this morning but Matthew didn't share in our excitement. In fact, Matthew didn't just "not" share in our excitement, he went as far as protesting our wishes and making it darn near impossible to accomplish "said" task. Didn't matter. Was able to find a few little semi smiles, a few peeks over the shoulder of mom to end up with a few shots of Matthew.

He is now officially two weeks old. I swear he's grown just since last week when I took his pictures!

I wanted to share this picture because ... well, its the only one I opened up to crop and I just love Brandi's hair. Yes, I know. Adorable amazingly cute baby and all I can focus on is Brandi's hair. My hair would never look like that. Anyways. I really want to try again with Brandi and Matthew because I made the lame mistake of staying upstairs and I have no backgrounds upstairs. I wanted to get some of Brandi and Matthew but I failed. She claims she doesn't mind coming back whenever I want. I'm going to hold her to it.

I'm going to do Matthews 3 month shots in a couple months from now but i think I may just have to have them back sometime within the next few weeks.

I'll post more pictures soon but right now, I have to go to work. My other job. The one that allows me to buy my "stuff". Oh, wait....thats Peats job ;)

Michelle

Introducing my practice model

She's such a sweetie .. isn't she? Her mom says she can be horrible but honestly, I don't have a CLUE what she could possibly be talking about.

I think she's exaggerating.

No.
NO.

I KNOW she's full of beans! This girl doesn't have a bad bone in her body!

I had my girlfriend Jamie come over today and let me take pictures of her daughter Gillian. Gillian and Justin go to school together. I'm just trying to get my lighting proper which takes a lot of practice and a lot of trial and error.

These two pictures are the first ever I'm officially sending out to a pro lab to see about their prints. They'll send me the prints and I can see how it looks with my monitor.

I'm kind of excited about it. I really want to see how it goes. After my walmart experience and all ;)

Thanks for helpin' out Jamie and Gillian.

I've decided that I desperately need a room for a studio set up in my home. SO for almost three years I've cocooned my youngest up in the basement of the house for sleeping because my oldest one can be quite loud at night. I just wanted Luke to have the best quality sleep available.

So Luke is now sleeping in his upstairs bedroom in his big boy bed. He's growing up. Maybe that's why its so hard. Up until three days ago he slept in a crib and now he's in a big bed. Time flies. I'd say its been fun but I'd be lying because its been hard. Luke is a challenging boy. Its his personality, strong will and temper. He's his momma's boy!

Wriggs

My Babooshka

Did you know that Babooshka means "Grandmother in Russian".

I would have never guessed. Seriously. Google it. I google a lot of things.

So for those of you who don't know whats been going on, or perhaps are super perplexed as to why I haven't really posted in a few days, let me share my story with you.

Shortly after taking those pictures of that little baby a few posts ago, I edited all the pictures, put them all on a CD for Brandi. *Brandi is the babies MOMMA* Ok, so put them all on a disc for Brandi and then DELETED the pictures from my Camera as well as from my computer. Then, just because I really liked on of the pictures, I took a few to Walmart to have them developed.

I was SURE they'd be awesome. By awesome, my main problems with Walmart have been underexposure, overexposure and WRONG cropping for photo size. EEEEK!

SO I get the envelope and slowly open it. I was grinning from ear to ear. Peat watched me open the envelope with a big smile on my face KNOWING that when I opened up the package, I would be very proud of myself. WRONG!

Opened it up, peeked at the pictures, stuffed them back into the package and walked outta there faster than I could even keep up with myself. Is that possible? Because that's what I did.

I got home and cried. Cried and cried. First of all, every picture was SO blown out. I mean, areas of the babies face, clothing were so blown that there was no detail at all. Just a big white blurb. I cried for a while. I was grumpy. I think somewhere in and around all of this I vowed to never pick of my camera again. I do this a lot when I'm frustrated. I know when I'm saying it, there is no truth to it but it does, it feels good to just say it. So I do.

Hey, I'm not perfect.

Anyways, Peat knew it was best to just steer clear and avoid the subject until I calmed down. During this time I had sent a few emails to some girls from my photography site. By the way BETH and SHRIVA *don't even know you're real name*..... I can't thank you enough!

Anyways I shared the pics with them and they confirmed that the pictures were NOT blown at all on their calibrated monitors. PHEW! Except I was still stuck with what to do. SO, Peat and I were in Ottawa on Sunday and so we stopped in and I printed out the same pictures from the disc. Its funny because when I got the envelope I was afraid to open it. Peat was like, GO ON, OPEN IT. I clutched them to my chest in fear! I mean, if they were crap.....that would seal the deal? I couldn't DO this. I can't compete in the world of photographY! Not now, not ever. So I held onto the package, unopened. Clutching to my last few minutes as a "just starting out photographer".

I opened the pictures and they were perfect. Just perfect. Then I had my answer. Walmart sucks for photo processing. Period. This isn't the first batch of pictures they've sold me that have been awful. I always thought there was something I was doing wrong. There wasn't. It was them and their equipment. I'm done developing pictures there. 4x6's ... sure. Nothing else. Nothing that matters.

I just wish that I knew it was WALMART before Peat bought me my new computer with the 22 inch MEGA SCREEN. My eyes are bugging out its so big. I"ll take a picture of it tomorrow.

This picture of Luke is the first pic I've edited on my new computer. Me LIKES IT!

Wriggs.

Please Stand By

This just in...

I got a new computer after my 'ranting' the other day

and so it may take me a few days to get back to posting.

I'm sure I will have it figured out later on tonight.

I've been sitting here at the computer since yesterday at 7pm.

Ouch.

One more from Yesterday

I just couldn't help it. I've spent the whole night sitting here at the computer doing final edits on my photos from the other day. What a challenge!

At first I though, "eh, newborn. Easy".
Boy was I wrong. I'm just happy that mom likes them. I only promised one or two keepers. Hope she sees more than that. Maybe a few anyways.

She's coming back next week to do the naked baby thing. All curled up ina ball. Good Lord he's cute.

Truth be told, I would have told her anything just to get her and that baby over here one more time :) Seriously. He's super cute.

Alright. Heading to bed. My eyes are like saucers and tomorrow is a big day. I've offered to practice on my friend and her two boys. Dad is away and she wants some pictures to send him.

I'll let you know how it goes.

Michelle

I live in Clutter

Ok, not really. First of all, my friends laugh at me because I refuse to move from one activity to the next, without cleaning up the first activity. For example, if my kids are playing in the living room and its time to go out, I will make them *and I will help* clean up the toys and place them back in the toy room where we got them.

If we are having dinner, I am a little neurotic there in the kitchen too. So, the first thing is, I clean as I cook. I don't cook often so its not a big deal really but I can not sit down to eat dinner until all my cooking dishes and clean and in the drying rack. Just can't. Dinner, lunch, breakfast is just not enjoyable unless I KNOW that i only have our dishes we eat from, to clean. Then when dinner/lunch/breaky is done, I must clean up and do the dishes. Which brings me to another point. I don't ever fill my sink with water and do dishes. I have a scrub brush filled with soap, crank on the water and wash one dish at a time.

Easier that way.

People think I'm weird.

Heck, I think I'm weird.

Friends come over and I know they think I'm weird. Its ok. I just having some wiring issues with me. My mind/body is not at rest unless the places I've been and things I've used, are put away properly. This doesn't mean my house is perfect. FAR FAR from perfect. I have a cleaner who comes in once every two weeks to do my nitty gritty cleaning. Bathrooms, kitchen, floors, dusting. I just have to pick things up, she comes in and makes my house smell all pretty.

I'm a SAHM. People find it odd that i have someone else come in to clean. Let them think what they want. Taking care of two young boys is HARD work.

Anyways, lately I've been finding myself stressing out about clutter. All my drawers are full. All my closets are full. I have no more room. No room for much of anything. I see clothing in drawers that either 1) don't fit the kids or 2) wrong season to wear. So I just cram things in my drawers, the kids drawers thinking, "I'll get to it later". Except "later" never comes.

Now Christmas is coming, I have gifts with no where to put them. My Christmas gifts for the children are in the TUB in the basement bathroom behind a shower curtain. WHO does this?

Someone with clutter.

I have photography equipment coming out my butt now. Lights, stands, umbrellas, backgrounds, fuzzy carpets. Plexi glass *hopefully soon*.... eeeek, all this stuff and no where to set it up. SO I'm in a dilemma. Luke currently sleeps in a bedroom that he will not be in forever. So since I'm not ready to move him out of that room *because it has the crib*I am going to have to get a new bed for in there so I can get rid of the BIG bead in there. I know, its a mess.
I'm a mess.

I live in clutter.

I need to fix that.

Among other things ;)
Wriggs

I totally have the ITCH

I had the wonderful pleasure today to have my friend come over and let me take pictures of her beautiful seven day old baby boy. Not only is he gorgeous, but he was SUCH a good boy. He slept. He opened his eyes. He cried a little but it was such a sweet delicate cry that I wanted him to keep doing it just so I could hear that little tiny voice.

Now one thing I did learn from today, is that as hard as I find it to take photos of toddlers, I find it equally as difficult to photograph newborns. Go on, laugh. I don't blame you, really. A sweet slumbering baby? Whats so hard about that? Well, since you asked..... Its hard to position them and find new exciting things to do with them. Not to mention that if you want to take their clothes off, they don't really like it. They're not "all about the picture" like moms and photographers :)

Anyways, for my first newborn shoot I was just really wanting to walk away with one good picture. One picture that I can give to mom and dad that will make them happy. And although there is nothing exciting about this picture , it is exciting to me because 1) I took it and 2) its a 7 day old baby and at this picture is about 99% straight out of camera. Very little editing. Almost none. Just a little exposure and that's it.

See, he was perfect just the way he was ... and lighting? Well, that's my fault. I'm still playing around. Actually, this specific picture was taking with natural light. Window only. I'd say it turned out pretty good.

Wriggs

I've always said...

Since Luke was born, I remember thinking "wow, he's a deep thinker". Then, as he got a little older in months, I thought, "wow, he's an old soul". Old Soul seemed fitting because he always seemed wise beyond his years. Seemed a little grumpy, a little ticked off and just overly dissatisfied with whatever was going on.

He just seemed so.....elderly.

Now that he's two and a half I realize that "grumpy, ticked off, deep thinker and dissatisfied" are all just accurate words to describe Luke who is my youngest boy.

But by God I love him. For all the reasons he drives me crazy, I can count twice as more as to why I love Luke. I remember people use to say, "You love your children differently but just as much". I always thought that was horsepoop. There was no way I'd love my kids differently. I loved them the same.

Then around the time Luke was 9 months old, I got it. Like a big beacon came and smacked me in the for head. I did love them differently because as individuals they were as different as night and day. I had to love them differently because together, they were SO opposite each other. The things I ADORE about Justin, I don't adore about Luke. He either lacks those qualities or he just shows them differently. And vice verse, the feisty, strong willed, independent and opinionated Luke has to be loved for those qualities while in Justin those traits just aren't as prevalent. They may be there, just in a different way.

I always say that Luke is lucky that he ended up with NON SPANKING parents because had he been born to parents who spank, he'd have his arse whooped a few times by now.

NOTE: there is nothing wrong with spanking, we just don't use it to discipline our kids ;)

Wriggs

Will SOMEONE COOPERATE

I don't need to say anything at all do I?

They never listen to me.

I'll post more later.

Michelle

AAAHHH, What will I wear ?

No picture to share, just panic. Oh ok, one picture. My neighbour sent it to me the other day. She snapped it while I was at the baby shower.

I've just returned home from a friends house. My day started innocent enough. I thought it would be kind of me to offer my baby wipe warmer to a girlfriend of mine who just had a baby. By "Just", I mean 4 days ago.

We had to get one for Luke when he was 18 months old *yes, that is not a typo* because he started screaming with diaper changes because the wipes were too cold on his little man bits. So, we searched high and low to find one and my mom ended up buying one for us because we couldn't find one in our small town.

Now that Luke is potty trained *except for #2* we don't need it anymore. I don't want his bum changes to be soft and warm and pleasant. I want them to be as uncomfortable as possible so that he will "get it" that its best to just use the toilet. Hasn't worked so far.

Anyways, I went over to Brandi's house and met her sweet little baby boy.

Somehow, as I often do, I put my foot in my mouth. Not in a bad way, because what I offered was heartfelt and I really WANT to do it but as soon as I said it, sheer panic came across me. I started to feel hot and a little sweaty. My hands started to clam up and my stomach started to flip flop as butterflies danced around. I offered, almost insisted, that I come over to her house on Thursday morning and take some pictures of her little baby boy.

We're close enough that if I didn't turn out any good shots, she wouldn't care. When Peat and I moved to Petawawa, we were neighbours and soon realized that *get a pen and try to follow along* my cousins wife's brother was her husband and they lived next door. So we're pretty much family. HEY, in a town of 15,000 it counts as family ;)

Anyways, now I'm all worried about Thursday. I don't know what to say, don't know what to do, what to bring. What should I wear? All these decisions run through my already racing mind! I'm just going to use natural light, no flash. She has a big window. But I have no props at all. I guess all I need really is a black sheet and maybe a fuzzy blanket. I'm sure I can work a little somethin' with that. I don't know about everyone else but I don't think as a newborn you can get a horrible shot in a mothers eyes. You know?

Anyways, I've got to do some looking around to get some ideas for poses. Not that I expect a newborn of 7 days to "pose".

I'll post my pictures on here if I come out with anything noteworthy.

Wish me luck ;)

This baby was SO worth the drive

So on Saturday night I got in my car prepared to drive an hour and a half to my mother and father in laws house. Its a long, dark and winding road with deer mulling' around ready to jump in front of your car and NO lights at all. Just your headlights.

I pride myself on living in a bubble for the most part. With my husbands job, I certainly can't think in realistic terms or I would probably never let him leave the house for fear of someone hurting him while he's working. He tells me stories but I always just "know" that he'll be ok.

I wish my bubble would stay with me while I was driving. For some reason while driving, I don't live in a bubble. I actually live in a crazy little place in my own mind where I fear everything. I fear the old man standing at the isolated convenience store leaning against his old beat up pick up truck. I fear the driver who's in front of me driving slower than he's suppose to. I start thinking that the two of them must be working together. One will drive slow in front of me, while the other one boxes me in from behind. I get nervous, I press the gas a little more than I should and next thing I know I'm passing slow mover in front of me, in the pitch black night, driving 120 kms per hour in a deer zone! I start to think about things like "what if this car stops and the man *I assume its a man, could be an elderly lady* jumps out at me and waves me down? I definitely won't stop but will I swerve? Will I just plough thru? If I do plough right though, will I stop? Will I call the police? I start to sweat, take my foot off the gas pedal and try with all my might to think logically.

I'm on my way to the in laws because early the next morning we were going to a baby shower where I would hold my niece for the very first time. Her little 7 week old self ;)

So I finally get off that one road, only to turn down another winding, dark 'forested' road. This time I am feeling a little less claustrophobic because there is now an extra lane, which for some reason settles me down. Its at these times, that I miss my bubble. I would give anything to put myself in my bubble. Then I think about those loser shows where someone puts an inflatable man in the passenger seat so it looks like the driver isn't alone. I wonder where to get one and what I'd call it. Would I buy a man or a woman? Probably a man to simulate my husband. Would I call him Peat? Would I talk to him on our drive? Would he talk back? Hopefully not.

Anyways, I arrive at destination IN LAWS after a long painful drive.

The next morning we drove about three hours south to the location of the shower and at precisely 1:30pm, I met my sweet little princess Victoria.

I held her in my arms right away and thought, "Yep, I want another baby". Who cares that Peat and I had decided two was enough *because Luke is so difficult*. Who cares that in an attempt to solidify our decision we had a massive yard sale and sold all of our baby stuff? Who cares? What is stuff anyway? A little extra cash and I can get it all back ;) I think I want another baby.

Except WHY would I want another baby? Its not like my baby would come out female. Not that it matters completely but lets be honest, if I had a choice, I'd probably choose a girl. Boys are awesome, let me start there, but really, what mother doesn't want a daughter?

When dh and I were going to try for a third, we actually said we'd prefer a third boy because we already had all the clothes and toys but you know what? After shopping for a girl for this baby shower, I'd LOVE to buy more girl clothing. I could barely stop myself from buying everything I saw. I wanted it all. I even considered one outfit for Luke that was in the girl section. I hoped it would be a little boyish too but then the pants had a flare leg. No good.

Anyways, baby shower was a hit. Little Victoria was sweet and little. The above picture is Victoria with he Great Grandmother. My husbands grandmother.

Other people arrived at the shower and babies were all around me. I know that if Peat had been with me, we'd be trying for a third. Boy or girl, wouldn't matter. He's mush when it comes to newborns.

Late last night I drove home in the same dark conditions as I had the night before. We won't go there with my trip home. Much the same as my trip there except on the way home I actually called hubby to come and meet me. I told him if I started to freak out too bad I'd just pull over and lock my doors until he got to me. My fear last night was the snow, not the scary creepy man at the gas bar. I did make it home though...One piece.

I think the feeling of wanting another baby has passed for now. After all, I am 34. I've only allowed myself until 35 to have babies. If I can just hold off for another year, it will be too late in my mind.

Plus I have two boys now who are constantly coughing, sneezing, choking and gagging. Its just what happens in the fall/winter. I could never bring a new baby here in all that!

I need to stop talking about babies.

Could someone please slap me.

Michelle